Bone Cancer

[spen559cer]

My husband's cousin had breast cancer awhile back, and it recently developed into bone cancer, which I know is in her spine, her liver and elsewhere. I know this person very, very well (for over 35 years), and she is one of those people who used to be able to do everything for everyone at any time. I saw here in June and I found out then about her bone cancer, and could tell she had already lost weight and some hair. She tried hormones, and she is just completing her first round of chemo Things don't look good and I have a feeling her end is rather near, and it just makes me cry just to think of her. My husband and I do call her, but the last time I spoke to her by phone, maybe I spoke too much, or said something I really didn't mean to say to hurt her, but within minutes she had to go to answer another call, and that was the end of the conversation. This is not typical of any conversation we've had in the past. She would always ask about me, my husband and family before she'd even utter a word about her and her family.

So here I've been suffering from my fibromyalgia and other chronic painful disorders, all the while she is suffering with something far worse, so far worse and I just don't know what to say to her. I did find a wonderful card full with feeling and hope and I mailed it to her from my husband, me and my children. It felt good to send it, whether it was the right or wrong thing to do.

Now, I just don't know what to do about seeing her (she lives almost 2 hours away from us) and I wouldn't want to stay too long for her own sake, nor would I know where to begin to say anything. I am a very emotional person and I just don't want to fall apart and cry or look very sad in front of her -- I really want to show my strength in this situation - but I do fall apart very easily.

I am looking for advice from anyone reading this post. Have any of you been in my position needing to reach out to a loved one who has cancer? or just has some sound advice? I would appreciate all replies. Thank you so much.